How to tell if the restlessness in your 40's, 50's or 60's is an invitation, not a breakdown.

Hello my dear friend,

You know that feeling when everything in your life looks “fine” on paper… but inside, something feels off?

The kids are older. The career is “okay”. Your home, church, community – nothing is actually on fire.
And yet, there’s this deep, nagging sense that you were made for something more.

You might even have whispered the words, “Am I having a midlife crisis?”

Let’s pause right there, lovely. 🌿
What if this isn’t a crisis at all…
What if it’s your calling knocking?

In this post, we’re going to unpack how to tell the difference between a garden-variety wobble and a genuine, God-stirred midlife calling – and how to respond without blowing up your life or ignoring your soul.

Midlife Isn’t a Malfunction – It’s a Wake-Up Call

The world loves to joke about midlife:

• sports cars

• drastic haircuts

• affairs

• running away to “find yourself”

But midlife is often less about losing your mind and more about waking up.

At some point in our 40s, 50s or 60s, the autopilot settings stop working.
We start asking deeper questions:

• Why am I here, really?

• Is this what the rest of my life will look like?

• Where did that younger, passionate version of me go?

Those questions aren’t proof that something is wrong with you.
They can be evidence that God is inviting you into a truer, deeper, more intentional season.

The Bible reminds us that God’s gifts and His call are irrevocable (Romans 11:29). You haven’t “aged out” of your purpose. If anything, midlife is often when the pieces of your story finally come together.

7 Signs This Might Be God’s Calling, Not Just a Crisis

You can’t always draw a neat line between “crisis” and “calling”, but here are seven patterns that often show up when God is stirring something new in a midlife woman.

1. You Feel a Holy Restlessness, Not Just Boredom

Boredom says, “Ugh, I’m over this.”
Holy restlessness whispers, “There’s more – and I want to be faithful to it.”

You might still show up for your responsibilities, but your heart is tugged toward deeper meaning and impact. You’re not just chasing excitement; you’re craving purpose.

2. The Same Theme Keeps Following You Around

A particular verse, topic, people group or idea keeps popping up:

• You hear it in a sermon.

• A friend mentions it over coffee.

• You stumble across it online again and again.

It’s like God is high-lighting the same sentence over and over:
Pay attention. This matters for you.

3. Your Wins Don’t Feel Like Wins Anymore

You achieve something you once dreamed of – the promotion, the project, the perfect family photo – and instead of feeling full, you feel… flat.

That doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful. It might mean those goals were stepping stones, not your final destination.

Often, God uses that “is this it?” feeling to nudge us toward the work He prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).

4. You’re Drawn to Certain People or Needs

Take note of:

• the stories that make you cry,

• the headlines that make you pray,

• the situations where you cannot stay neutral.

Maybe it’s younger women, carers, single mums, small business owners, lonely older women, or people in your own church who feel invisible.

Your heartache is often connected to your assignment.

5. Opportunities Crack Open Around the Same Theme

It might start small:

• Someone asks you for advice.

• You’re invited to help with a ministry or project.

• You’re asked to speak, write, volunteer or mentor “just this once”.

Often these “random” invitations line up with that inner nudge you’ve been feeling. They’re not always glamorous – but they are clues.

6. You Sense God Challenging Old Labels

Maybe you’ve always called yourself:

• “the shy one”

• “the practical one”

• “just a mum”

• “the behind-the-scenes helper”

Yet lately, you sense God whispering, “What if I see you as more than that?”

You may find yourself imagining things that feel too big for you – teaching, leading, creating, writing, starting, building. That stretching often accompanies calling.

7. Your Desire to Please God Is Growing Stronger Than Your Fear

You still feel afraid – that doesn’t magically disappear.
But slowly, there’s a shift:

“I’m more afraid of wasting what God’s given me
than I am of looking silly, failing, or starting late.”

That’s a huge sign of a maturing calling. You’re willing to be a beginner again because obedience matters more than optics.

3 Questions to Ask God About Your Midlife Calling

You don’t have to figure this out in one huge, dramatic moment. Calling usually becomes clearer as we walk with God, not as we sit and obsess.

Here are three prayer/journal questions to bring into your quiet time this week:

1. “Lord, where have You already been using me without me noticing?”

Look back over your last 5–10 years:

• When have people thanked you deeply?

• Where have you felt most alive and “in your lane”?

• What have you done that felt small to you but memorable to others?

Often your calling isn’t brand new – it’s a thread that’s already been woven through your life.

2. “What gifts, experiences and burdens have You entrusted to me?”

Make three short lists:

1. Gifts – what you’re naturally good at

2. Experiences – both painful and beautiful chapters

3. Burdens – the needs you can’t ignore

Then ask God: How might these fit together for this next season?

3. “What is one tiny step of obedience I can take this month?”

Calling isn’t just about clarity; it’s about movement.

• One email.

• One phone call.

• One conversation with a pastor or mentor.

• One afternoon given to serve someone in the area you care about.

Ask God for one step – then take it, even if your knees are knocking a little.

What If I Get It Wrong?

This is where so many midlife women get stuck.

We tell ourselves:

• What if I misheard God?

• What if I waste time?

• What if I change direction and it all falls apart?

Here’s some gentle truth for your heart:

• God is not playing hide-and-seek with your purpose.

• He’s a good Father, not a harsh boss.

• He knows how to close wrong doors and redirect willing hearts.

You don’t have to nail your “one perfect calling” on the first go.
You just need to be willing, listening and responsive.

Proverbs 3:5–6 reminds us to trust in the Lord with all our heart and not lean solely on our own understanding. As you acknowledge Him in this midlife stretch, He will direct your paths – even if it looks like a series of small, unsure steps rather than one big dramatic leap.

So… Is It a Crisis or a Calling?

Honestly? It might be a bit of both.

Crisis shakes the ground.
Calling invites you to rebuild on a better foundation.

If you’re feeling restless, teary, frustrated or “done” with surface-level living, you’re not losing it. You might be standing right on the threshold of the season you were made for.

Take a breath, lovely.
You’re not late. You’re being invited.

Keep bringing your questions, your fears and your calendar to God.
He hasn’t finished writing your story – and midlife might just be the chapter where your purpose gets its name.

Your Gentle Next Step

When you close this tab, don’t rush back into autopilot.

• Screenshot the three questions above, or

• Write them into your journal, and

• Book a 30-minute “calling date” with God this week.

This is YOUR life.
Let’s make these midlife years the most intentional ones yet.

Until we chat again....

Blessings and Hugs to you my dear friend,

Dianne xx