Hi there Lovely Lady,

Let’s be brutally honest for a moment:

Sometimes prayer feels… meh.

Not dramatic, not disastrous. Just flat. You sit down to pray, your brain sprints through your to-do list, and you end up scrolling instead of speaking.

If that’s you, I want you to hear this clearly:

A flat prayer life does not mean you’re a failure or that God is disappointed in you.

It usually means you’re human, you’re tired, and you might need a gentle reset — not a spiritual boot camp.

1. You’re not broken. Seasons shift.

In midlife, so much is changing:

• Bodies

• Sleep

• Roles and responsibilities

• Relationships with adult kids

• Work and money realities

• Grief, transition, “what now?” questions

A prayer rhythm that worked beautifully in your 20s may simply not fit the life you’re living now. That doesn’t make you less spiritual. It means you need a midlife-friendly way to connect with God.

Think of it like buying jeans: what suited your 18-year-old body probably doesn’t feel right now — and thank goodness. You’ve grown.

2. Name what’s actually going on

Before you “fix” anything, pause and get honest.

Some common reasons prayer feels flat in midlife:

• Exhaustion: You’re emotionally and physically wrung out.

• Disappointment: Prayers that didn’t get answered the way you hoped.

• Busyness: Caring for others leaves little energy for your own soul.

• Shame: You feel guilty about not praying “properly”, so you avoid it.

• Boredom: You’ve been saying the same words for decades and feel stuck.

Try journaling these prompts:

1. When did prayer last feel alive for me? What was happening then?

2. What feels hard about prayer in this season?

3. What do I wish prayer felt like right now?

This isn’t about blaming yourself. It’s about understanding where you’re starting from.

3. Release the unhelpful rules

Some quiet “rules” we carry into midlife:

• “If I don’t pray for at least X minutes, it doesn’t count.”

• “If I’m distracted, God must be annoyed.”

• “Real Christians have a perfect morning quiet time every single day.”

Can we gently put those down?

Here’s a better set of truths to carry:

• God is more interested in honesty than performance.

• A 3-minute, distracted, heartfelt prayer is still precious to Him.

• Showing up again after a dry season is an act of courage.

4. A 3-Step Gentle Prayer Reset

Let’s build a simple reset you can try over the next 7 days.

Step 1: One honest conversation

Set aside 10–15 minutes once (not every day) to talk frankly with God about how you’re really going.

You might pray something like:

“God, I’m not sure how to pray right now. Part of me feels tired, part of me feels a bit hurt or disappointed, and part of me misses feeling close to You. I don’t have fancy words, but I want to be honest with You again. Please meet me in this mess.”

Cry if you need to. Sit in silence. Journal. This is the start line.

Step 2: The tiny daily anchor (5 minutes)

Choose one small daily anchor for the next week — something you could still manage on your worst day.

Ideas:

• Reading one verse and whispering a one-line prayer

• Saying the Lord’s Prayer slowly, once

• Praying for one person each day

• Writing three bullet-point prayers in a notebook

Your goal each day is simply:

“I will turn my attention to God on purpose once today.”

That’s it. No gold stars for more. No punishment for less. We’re rebuilding trust and habit, not proving anything.

Step 3: Add one thing that brings joy

Many of us have made prayer a place of pressure. Let’s gently reintroduce delight.

Pick one joy-building element:

• Worship music you actually love

• A short walk outside while you talk to God

• A candle and a cosy corner

• Colour pens or stickers in your journal (if that’s your thing)

• A cup of tea you only drink during prayer time

You’re allowed to enjoy this. Joy doesn’t make prayer less “serious” — it makes it sustainable.

5. A 7-Day “Prayer Reset” Plan

You can tweak this, but here’s a simple template.

Day 1 – Honest start

• 10–15 minute honest conversation with God (Step 1)

• Choose your tiny daily anchor + joy element

Days 2–6 – Gentle repetition

Each day:

1. Do your tiny anchor (e.g. one verse + one line of prayer).

2. Include your joy element (tea, walk, music, candle).

3. At the end of the day, note: “Where did I sense God’s kindness today?”

This might be:

• A friend’s message

• A small answered prayer

• A moment of peace in a hard day

Day 7 – Reflect & adjust

Set aside 10–15 minutes and ask:

• What helped me connect with God this week?

• What felt like pressure or performance?

• What would I like to keep, tweak or drop?

Then decide your next tiny step for the coming week.

6. What about when you miss days?

Spoiler: you will.

When you realise you’ve skipped a few days, try this script:

“Lord, I’ve drifted a bit. Thank You that You haven’t. I’m here now. Let’s start again.”

Then, just do today’s tiny anchor. Don’t try to “catch up” spiritually. That’s not a thing.

7. How to handle old disappointment with God

Sometimes, prayer feels flat because there’s unresolved pain.

If that’s you, consider:

• Writing God a letter about the thing that still hurts

• Giving yourself permission to say, “I don’t understand”

• Inviting a trusted friend, pastor, mentor or counsellor into the conversation

You don’t have to pretend you’re fine to be a “good Christian”. Bringing your questions and grief is prayer.

8. You are allowed to begin again

Here’s what I’d say if we were sitting over coffee right now:

• You’re not behind.

• God is not rolling His eyes at you.

• The very fact that you’re reading about a prayer reset means your heart is still tender towards Him.

That’s beautiful.

So let’s keep it simple:

• One honest conversation

• One tiny daily anchor

• One small thing that brings joy

And permission — full, overflowing permission — to begin again as many times as you need.

Until we chat again...

Blessings and Hugs to you,

Dianne xx